So how do you write a really great best man speech?

Well forget everything you know about best man speeches, best man speeches, it shouldn’t be full of cut and paste googled wedding jokes.

They’re not funny. They never were funny.

Firstly, forget about talking about being the best man. No one’s interested. It’s boring. And it’s completely irrelevant.

This is a speech about the group. Forget the bridesmaid, the groom has just made a taste of them. You’re covering all ground. I know. It’s a tradition to thank on behalf of the bridesmaids, yada, yada, it’s not necessary.

Don’t thank anyone or welcome anyone. Everyone’s been thanked and welcome to death. So by the time you get up and start thanking and welcoming people, there’ll be searching for their revolvers.

You want to get straight into the funny and this should all be one big comedic observation of the groom, who he is, and what makes him.

Obviously, you’re saying something nice about him towards the end and his lovely new wife. But the main part of it is just a good dollop of light entertainment, and it needs to be funny so that everyone can laugh. Not just the guys who went for the stag party.

The best way to write a wedding speech is to make the whole thing a story from the beginning to the end. And it doesn’t matter how much fantasy you put into this in order to glue it together. Because the bottom line is with the best man speech, you’re just there to make people laugh.

So start at the beginning

Think about what he was like when he was a boy think about what he was into and think about where he is now. What did that fat kid who likes face offers and football and chewing gum? What what was there then that made him the accountant working for KPMG?

What is it that you can trace through all that story to make the whole big thing, one big story, and loop together?

The fact that he likes crisps the fact that he likes to blow dry his hair, the fact that he went bald, the fact that he likes Liverpool, the fact that he became an accountant, but did a year serve the teaching, weave all that together and think of a pathway all the way through there.

That’s how to write a great best man speech. Forget saying endless stories, three, four stories tied together is boring. It’s really really, really difficult to nail a really good story. Most of those stories were funny if you were there. But most stories take far too much detail and attention.

And if you can nail a story, you need a killer punch line. And most stories that I’ve seen, don’t have a killer punch line. So forget stories, take elements out of those stories and use them to weave your way.

So get those blocks, put them together and think of a way to get to a to be where he is now today are getting married. Don’t be crass, don’t be rude. You don’t need to swear. And at the end say something very profound about him about what makes him and why he is such a good mate or a brother or sometimes even a dad.

And then you’re out 10 minutes stand-up sit downtime.

You don’t want to do a talk any longer than that forget props. They are just an instrument for people to take their gaze and attention from you and start to zone out and they just make a very difficult day even more difficult so they can be forgotten. That is my advice on how to write a really great best man speech.

So how do you write a really great best man speech?


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